Nigeria is often referred to as the giant of Africa and that’s because from the world’s standpoint, we ought to be. We are truly blessed in almost everything ranging from natural resources to talents, skills (both entrepreneural and manpower skills) academic prowess etc. But the fact still remains that we’ve got some huge problems which require not only special attention but also some divine intervention.
Am going to be talking about an aspect out of all our problems. This aspect is the society which I see as a man made problem. Although, almost all our problems (if not all) are man made (or men made, whichever one you prefer to use, lol)We know that the society is not only made up of just where we live but also people living in it. It’s unfortunate that the society dictates the way we should live our lives.
In Nigeria, once a lady or a guy reaches his mid twenties and above, it is automatically expected that they should get married and society begins to mount pressure on them to get married. To the female, lots of examples and fabricated stories are been told with the sole aim of driving the moral lesson which concludes that women are not respected, seen as wayward or as a prostitute without a husband. The society usually assume that any adult male who is not married is either irresponsible or gay.
These pressures have made so many rush into marriage just to avoid been called names such as irresponsible, prostitute, gay (lesbians inclusive), wayward etc. It is still the same society that will pressurise them into elaborate weddings after which they will all flee (return to their homes after the wedding ceremonies) and the couple will be left alone to bear the consequences. At times, these pressures make intending couples to either empty their account or at times go borrowing thus adding to frustration in their marriage.
Personally, I will advice that you should take one step at a time. Do not let the society to pressurise you into what you are not ready for. For the fact that Mr/Miss Annoymus got married before 30 doesn’t mean yours will have to be. Marry only if you want to and at your convenience too.
Besides I haven’t seen where it is written that it’s a must you should marry. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean that marriage is wrong or evil, but do not get married when you are not ready. To a reasonably degree, you must be emotionally, psychologically, physically and financially capable of doing so. The society will only be at your wedding and not in your marriage. The earlier you realise that there is difference between wedding and marriage, the better. Wedding is just a day or just a short period of time while marriage is a lifetime commitment (except when one’s spouse dies or unforgivable adulterous act). So my dear, think twice before rushing in so you don’t end up either stuck or rushing out. Gracia.