I read online that a certain Nigerian man slapped his girlfriend/fiance for frying four eggs at once. It sounded funny and laughable but let’s really look at it from another angle objectively. 

First and foremost, the man slapping the lady, am not taking it! That’s an abuse and a distain on her dignity. He needs to apology to her publicly if you ask me.

Lots of medical practitioners had always told us that an egg per day is enough to provide in us the needed benefits we seek. As a matter of fact, they went further to say that someone who eats an egg and someone who ate a crate of eggs will still have the same amount of nutrients from egg. So if that is the case, was she really wasteful?

To me I would say yes, and I have my reasons for saying so.

1. We know how bad our economy is. Money is hard to come by and commodities are so expensive that we always apply scale of preference and opportunity cost often. If she is the one that worked for her money, she could probably use it the way she wanted, although frying four eggs per meal will still not make sense if we are trying to be rational to a reasonable degree

2. There is a popular Yoruba adage that says “If somewhere you expect sense from and it’s not coming forthwith, then it upsets”. The man in question might have wanted her for a wife and probably didn’t expect such a thing from her. Every man needs a woman who would organise and help him build his empire and not one to ruin it. If she keeps frying four eggs per meal, she would end up finishing food meant for longer days for a moment. No man loves re-visitng an already settled bills.

3. OK am not a medical practitioner but I just feel it could “probably” have some health risks (I just said probably biko don’t cut my neck, lol) like too much cholesterol, obesity etc (OK let me stop before I fuck up, lol)

But be that as it may, I think it’s wrong for a lady (for that matter) to fry four eggs, sit-down and catapult it into her esophagus. Me wey be say I dey go maishai (those aboki that sells bread and tea) na only two eggs pere I dey buy. Hian, Isorrite.

PS: Before all those Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s followers wee come after me, I wasn’t insinuating that women are inferior to men o when I said “a lady for that matter”. But also, we shouldn’t also forget that this is Africa!